The Hayes Report

Sports Ignorance

        Living in Tallahassee as long as I have, I developed a little saying about Seminole fans and it goes like this…..”Seminole fans know little about Sports and less about Football.”  Every once in a while I spout this line off to one of my Seminole friends, of course, they hate me for it but they take it well if only because we’re friends.

          This year I actually attended 3 FSU baseball games.  I’ll never be a Seminole football or basketball fan, but I actually enjoyed the baseball games.  I’m sure, to the surprise of some of my friends, I was actually pulling for the FSU baseball team.  However, there are things that go on at the baseball games that prove my point about Seminoles and their sports knowledge.

          In section B of Dick Howser stadium is a group of fans that call themselves “The Animals.”  Animals would be a compliment for this bunch, but that isn’t the point.  This is a group of fans that have no baseball etiquette what so ever and what tops it all off is they are a noisy bunch of “animals” when they are supposed to be quiet and you can hear a pin drop when they should be making noise.

          Rumor has it that a few years back they all started out as a bunch of football fans looking for more Seminole Sports to cheer.  I say more power to them as they deserve and should cheer for their favorite teams.  However they took football  “cheering” rules and applied it to baseball games.  This means they do the exact opposite of what they are supposed to do when the baseball team is hitting or on the field.  Now I don’t know if they started as football fans, but that’s what I was told, but for sure they treat the baseball team as if it is a football team.

          Little leaguers know when to chatter and when to shut up.  The Animals don’t.  Even Ferris Bueller and his friend Cameron know which team they are supposed to try to irritate and when.

          Do you remember back in little league when you were out in the field and you were taught to chatter and your parents clapped to try to distract the hitter of the opposing team.  You did this to break the hitter’s concentration.   It didn’t bother the pitcher; the hitter is the one who needs increased concentration not the pitcher.

          Well these “animals” clap and make all kinds of racket when the Seminoles are up to bat; allegedly trying to distract the pitcher I’m told.  What a bunch of idiots.  Do they not realize that they are only distracting their own team.  Oh, you can say they are used to it but then that’s like taking a picture of Tiger Woods when he’s teeing off.  Oh you can say he’s used to it but he still doesn’t like it and it hurts his concentration.

          One of their silly traditions is to sing “Oh Canada” at the bottom of the fifth inning, of course, while Seminole hitters are trying to hit.  More distraction!  There is a plethora of routines they go through mostly when they need to just shut up.  What makes it worse is when they are supposed to be distracting the opposing teams hitters you can hear a pin drop in section B.  So they cheer the baseball team like it’s a football team.  At a football game there are times when you are cheering and times when you are quiet depending on what position your team is in at a particular moment in the game.  Even most average Seminole fans know when to “hush” and when to “cheer.”

          In the case of “the animals” don’t know doodly-squat about when to make noise and when to be quiet at a baseball game.  They need to make a road trip to Atlanta to learn a thing or two.  When the Atlanta Braves need a rally and are up to bat they use the tomahawk chop to encourage the team, right up until the batter steps up to the plate, then they go quiet.  That’s not the case at Dick Howser Stadium.  When the Noles are up to bat they are quiet until their batter steps in, then they clap and get louder as the pitcher as well as the pitch approaches the plate.

          The rest of the fans in general are actually pretty ignorant to baseball etiquette as well.  At least once every game, while the Noles are up to bat, someone will get up and lead a “Nole” cheer.  More Distraction!  This is a cheer that should be done between innings, to encourage the Noles and pass the time for the fans between innings.  Instead they are distracting the players as well as distracting the fans from the action on the field.

          After seeing this display of ignorance for three games I’ve come to a new conclusion.  Nole fans know little about football and nothing about sports.

          Maybe “the animals” just need to be educated.  Animals, when it’s fourth and goal for your team what do you do? Right!  You shut the hell up.  Why? So your team can concentrate.  Ok!  You’re down by 2 with 2 on and 2 out with a 2 and 2 count on the hitter!  What are you suppose to do?  SHUT THE HELL UP!!!  DAMN.  I suddenly think of a Peter Paul and Mary tune……. When Will They Ever Learn.

P.S. to the Animals and all Florida State Fans.................please don't email me revealing more of your ignorance, I'll just be vicious on my reply anyway.  If you must here it is.......